Public Performance in Alaska

During my vacation in Alaska I went on an amazing hike to Lake Ptarmigan with my Aunt's Women's Group. There were about twenty women ranging in age from mid-fifties to mid-sixties. It was a very interesting group of women, and I truly enjoyed the hike. When we made it to Lake Ptarmigan, I decided it was the perfect opportunity to satisfy one of my public performances--even thought it was a remote location. :o) With the women's group, and the other people (about 15-20) that were also up there, I had a good size audience, and I was quite nervous.

I started by telling the audience about Aim High and the Dare to Dream Team and talked about the three forms we have to learn as 2nd Degree Candidates (Palgwe 8, Chumo 4, and Curio), and then I performed all three forms. The uneven ground made it somewhat difficult to maintain balance, and I got pitch all over my feet, but it was totally worth it.

While I was performing, my aunt took some great pictures. Didn't get any good shots of my kicks, but some of the chambers, strikes and blocks look rather good. :o) It was a great experience.

The Sound of Silence

So I often wonder if anyone ever reads these blogs.... I like having to do these to throw right out there what is difficult to do (like our open forms.... I've got about a 3rd of it down, but can I just hide under the bed now? ). I like using it to tell of whatever I've accomplished today (Like when we were MMA fighting with Bkjn (wow, that sounds funky) Dan and I grabbed his leg mid-kick & pulled him in to punch him in the stomach... ha!). But then I know we're told to be sure & enter at least one per week, which is fine, but seldom do we ever get any comments (except for Cgn Girl Sam... thank you, by the way). Then I look at the video blogs at the # of views, and often times there's maybe 1 view or 2, but that's it. Not that I mind that part because doing the video blogs are hardly my favorite or anyone else's, but I don't know, I just thought they should be read too. Okay, here's what we're going to do to find out who actually reads this: The next time you see me, pretend you're Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory and say, "Bazinga". Oh, and no telling anyone else so they can say false Bazinga's either. ;)

Fencing

       Last week I decided to take some fencing classes. I didn't just take it for the extra exercise, but fencing is very similar in a way to sparring and sticks. I also leave fencing classes with sore muscles in the weirdest places like behind my knees, under the wrists and sometimes my feet are stiff. I highly recommend fencing to those who want a good workout and also want to gain speed and fast tactics. I love the sabers ( or swords ) because they're just like what you see in the movies! Except the fact that the end of the foible ( or tip of the blade ) is bent so that no one can well.... die.

  I love, love this new sport and it is defiantly a great way to gain some speed and strength!! And besides any class with a weapon is fun.  :)

 Well everyone is doing an amazing job so far!!!! Keep it up!!!!

Z0E

Quote

I saw this quote by Michael Jordan... thought it was appropriate as I'm sure most of us have felt or do feel this way...

"My attitude is that if you push me towards something that you think is a weakness, then I will turn that perceived weakness into a strength."

Exposure (to another school)

Right now, I'm at the general store in Spring Green, Wisconsin. This is the only place with in 50 miles of our family cabin that has internet. I will be posting a video journal as soon as I can. Tonight, I'm going to my cousin's tae-kwan-do class in downtown Spring Green. (Its a very small town.) My cousin is a black belt at the school and she said that I could participate in their class tonight. It is a small school, but they do some of the same forms we do. I don't really know what to expect- my cousin says that training are very intense so, I'm kind of wondering.... My mom and I are trying to get her to come down for the final show in October. Got to get back to vacation. Miss Everyone! See you on the 3rd at training (after flying all day). Bye!

CGN Taylor

Courage is not the absence of fear //

overwhelmed....

honestly, i can't wait for class tonight, just to get my mind off of school prep work.

as some of you know, i'm going back to school. which is awesome and i'm looking forward to it.

but there are a few things that are needed...such as high school transcripts...which i don't really have. why? do you ask? well, i was home-schooled. I did the stuff, went to the classes, did the assignments, took the tests, and passed. but after a while, i THREW EVERYTHING AWAY. why? probably cause i got tired of all the paper everywhere, didn't know how to organize it (i'm not the most organized person) and threw it all away cause i got tired of moving it from one place to another just to move it again.

so now the only proof i have that i am educated is the books i still have that i read and studied, my art, and a lesson planner for each year of high school. that's it. one would think that the college courses i took in high school would be enough to prove that i did go to school and that i am educated. nope.

so here i am, in the middle of books, books, books, and more books. god help me if someone starts fire. it'd be screwed. in the mean time, i'm trying to describe the books, what i learned, figure out how to make transcripts, tearing my house apart trying to find proof of the work i did in high school, finding hardly anything. and all i want to do is break down and cry.

not only is this on the forefront of my mind, but there's also the requirements that i have yet to do, like those video journals, push ups, sit ups, projects, my best friend's bachelorette party that i planned that's this weekend, her wedding next weekend, finding scholarships, tuition reimbursement, loans, financial aid, interviews, profiles, finding a real job, creating an open form,

it's all so much. and for the record, yes, i gave in and cried.

i want to go running, but know that this mess will still be here, waiting for me.

110%

So, after the inspiration of Kjn Tom & Master Dave's classes, I came into Monday's class totally ready to kick butt... or whatever else might get in my way. I kicked harder, with good chambers and did everything to the best of my ability. For an hour and a half. My body hates me. :)

I'm not sore today, just exhausted. I think going from giving like 80% all the way to 110% was about 10% too fast. I'll try for 105% tomorrow night... With my luck, I'll end up with push-ups. ;)

From CGN Sarah

I don’t know about the other black belts and candidates, but I had a great time training with Tom Callos at the seminar on Friday night. (:) I really don’t want to meet him in a dark alley!!!) He is such a great teacher! I really enjoyed how he looked at things with a different perspective. It was really cool! I thought it was funny how his “5 minutes” lasted for like a half an hour. KJN Jeremy says that’s 5 minutes in “Tom Callos Time”. Hehe… :) I had fun training with zoe last night. It was fun because she’s been gone for so long that I’ve been Taylor’s partner 4 a while and it was nice training with someone different. I really liked the way KJN did sparring last night. Usually I strongly dislike sparring with all my heart, but the way we did it last night was kind of fun! Tonight I’m going to go see captain America with my mom, dad, and KJN Jeremy because its 5 dollars for all movies on Tuesdays.

-CGN Sarah

A master's weekend...

This past weekend was, without a doubt, one I'll be talking about for a looong time. We had the honor of hosting Master Tome Callos and Soke Dave McNeill, both in our home and in our studio. Wisdom and experience was in abundant supply and, as always, readily given and accepted. It's remarkable that such a diverse group of people can come together and truly listen to one another.

Thursday started off with BKJN Dan and I picking Master Dave up from the airport. A beautiful Portland day with light clouds and cool air, we headed for coffee, then training. What a treat to be able to train with someone with such a wealth of wisdom! We were soaking it up, from the little life lessons to the technical side of our martial arts training. We practiced techniques from the second belt level of the Goju Shorei Martial Arts system that gives Master Dave the title 'Soke', meaning head of that system.

The next day we all headed out to the airport, once again, to pick up our first instructor, Master Tom Callos. For those who don't know, BKJN Dan and I started martial arts in reno between '88 and '90 at a studio in the southeast part of Reno....small world! We had some quick breakfast and headed in to Aim High to talk shop and practice the materials to be tought at the night's Black Belt workout. The physical techniques with which we learned to be creative are derived from what Master Callos calls 'payload delivery'. The idea is to deliver as much force to the intended target as possible, without wasting time or movement or dropping your guard....awesome new idea and approach as it emphasizes open handed striking to reduce the risk of injury typically incurred when punching a solid object with a closed fist. This 'payload delivery' may have appeared to be what we spent most of our time practicing, but what Master Callos was really teaching went far beyond and addressed the way we work as individuals, teams, classes and how we can take that levels beyond and eventually effect change in our community and the world around us....kinda deep, huh?

Having spent the weekend with us, Master Callos and Soke McNeill were able to be at Aim High during operational hours on Saturday and see classes ranging from the 3-5 year old Lil' Warriors to adults and kickboxers. It was good fun watching KJN Tom rolling with the Jiu Jitsu students and sharing drills and exercises he has picked up along his travels and training. He even jumped in to a kids class and was able to squeeze that little extra effort out of the kiddos!! There were two more special classes that had the kids and adults excited and motivated in a way only KJN Tom can create!

What an honor it was to have these two masters of martial arts in our studio! It's truly remarkable how inspiring good, heartfelt feedback can be along with expert advice backed by over 80 years of wisdom and experience!! These opportunities only come along every so often, so I'm sure I speak for those able to attend, when I say, What an empowering weekend!!!

-KJN Jeremy

motivating weekend

this week has been crazy busy.

first, friday was awesome. learned some interesting things in kjn tom's class. one thing that he said at the end really had me thinking. he said that whatever our biggest struggle is, that's our test. adapting to that certain situation and making it work.

that night after class, i ended up going to dinner with some of the people from class with kjn tom and master dave. that was a really cool experience just getting to talk with them about what they do and why they do martial art.

but the highlight of that night (for me) was when mike mercer and his wife joined us for dinner. i know that initially, they were there so that mike and kjn tom could talk about mike's company, compassion first. and since i was sitting right across from them, i got to listen to mike talk about his company and what they do and want to do. it was amazing because they do something very similar to what i want to do.

saturday was go go go. it was good to be back teaching the kids for one day. i really missed them so i liked that i could be with them again. and then later that day there was the bbq at the leitners that was fun. there, i got to talk to master dave a lot more and he was so encouraging but also he asked questions and made suggestions that really made me think about how my future goals would work, what it would take for them to work, and how to get there.

and then today i went to devry and took the admissions test. when i was done, i honestly had no idea how i did, but evidently, i did pretty well. my reading and arithmetic were way above average and my algerbra looked good and the writing i scored on much higher than usual as well.

now all i have to do is apply for more scholarships and loans and i'm on my way...

Finally

So this week I went to Master Dave's class and two of Kjn Tom's classes while we were lucky enough to have them in town. Funny thing was, that with all of the valuable things they taught us IN class, I learned the most from what they told me after class.

The biggest hurdle I've had during all of my training is the fact that I am easily twice as old, or even 4 times as old as some of the individuals on my black belt candidate team. How do I deal with not being stronger and faster than them? Master Dave told me I'd be crazy to try to keep up with the 'young bucks'. I thought I was going to end up as frustrated as always with the inevitable conclusion that I'm just older, that's the way it is, accept it and never be better than them. But the longer Master Dave, Kjn Tom and I talked, I understood what they were saying.

As you get older, your body just can't do what it used to, or at least not as fast, as the younger people around you. So, you have to fight smarter. Continue learning new techniques, practice those you already know to ingrain them into your memory, don't underestimate your opponent, but most of all, don't underestimate yourself.

I've discovered that I'm not old. I'm just now learning what we're all capable over time. And we can do so much more than we give ourselves credit for. Time is the gift we are given to learn it all. Or at least as much as possible. ;)

KJN Tom Callos and demo performance

This was a really great week for martial arts. I got to participate in a class with KJN Tom Callos and had a demo performance at the Relay for Life. It was a fantastic class and I learned a lot of things. The whole class we only used two moves the palm strike and a slap. However there was so many ways we applied them. From striking from a guarding stance to striking on your back. He called me to help him demonstrate a drill and I could just feel energy coming off of him and rubbing on me.(Not to lie I was kind of nervous.) But he led me through and I ended up doing a great job. It was based altogether on how your strike was but your awareness, intensity being at ten, and reality. Before the demo performance we had practice and we practiced on different sized stages so we would be prepared. It turned out ok and it was good to know that we could adapt. The I just had to add this at a the potluck KJN Tom liked my lemonade! Wooh! Then came the performance it wasn't the biggest crowd and we had to do it on grass but it turned out great. Also it was cool because we saw other aim high families there not for the demo but for the actual event. It's nice to know that we have nice people like that at aim high.

Amazing week

I was excited to train with Master Dave and KJN Tom. The things Master Dave taught us where cool. Especially when he showed us how to increase our punch and kicking power by 25%-30%. I was amazed at how many pressure points are in our bodies. KJN Tom did a power drill and some funny things. He also made a joke with me about the dragons.

Saturday BBQ

Hi Everyone! So after the adult seminar with KJN Tom Saturday (2-3:30PM) Black Belts are invited to our house for a "before the Tron demo" BBQ and potluck. We are providing hamburgers and hot dogs (they are chicken) and ask you to bring side dishes and/or drinks. Demo team has to be at Valley Catholic by 7:40 so I expect the party to break up at 7PM at the latest.

I sent an email via comcast with address and directions. Check it or call me if you need more info after reading it.

H5
The Leitners

Monday - 4th week

Looking forward to KJN Tom tonight - just wanted to post a quick reminder that Monday night I won't be in training - 4th week of the month so board meetings...or as BKJN Dan would say "bored" meetings. :-)

Ben Franklin

When I was in the process of picking my affirmation I came across a quote by Benjamin Franklin in which he states: "Those things that hurt, instruct". After last night, I hope he's right.

Panic Attack

It seems like whenever I do a blog, I'm having a total panic attack about something. Yep, and here I go again. I'm totally stressing a 30 second open form. Suppose I forget it in the middle of the performance? Suppose it looks dumb? Nothing like making a fool of yourself in front of everyone we know and their relatives. Can I PLEASE just hide under a rock instead? I have 2 left feet and I really don't want to do this at all. Ever. Ever. Ugh!

Age

This morning I woke up with a stiff neck. I didn't think anything of it. It was raining and the window was open. I went down to the garage to move some kayaks around (Jess and I had a morning stroll planned on the Tualitan River). In the process of moving these light but awkward items I felt a POP go from my neck all the way down to my lower back. I was frozen for a minute bent over not able to stand up. Once I was able to move again I went into the house and popped some Ibuprofen rubbed on some icy hot and I have been alternately putting hot and cold packs on it all day. I plan on seeing the chiropractor in the morning and hopefully I'll be ready for class by tomorrow night.
I'm a little frustrated because this has been happening more frequently lately. I feel like I get myself in a good workout rhythm and something seems to always happen to stop my progress. I realize that as I get older I need to do more warming up before I go into a full workout. The truth is I don't want to. I want to stay young and invincible. Growing up is hard to do.

looking forward to this weekend to go to a class with kjn tom. it'll be good to learn from someone who has so much experience and knowledge to offer.

unfortunately, i won't be able to go to the seminar with master dave as i have already made plans for that evening. so for those of you going, you'll have to fill me in on what he taught! :)

had an amazing run last night. it was just one of those nights where the running came so easy and motivation was constantly there through out the whole run. and i def took advantage of. afterwards, i felt that i could still keep running. my dog however, was not feeling it. he wanted to stop.

Back to it

Busy week last week - I was at a 3 day conf. in bend - got some exercise in on the trails but not as much as I would have if we could have been at the studio. Camping was cancelled because the park closed due to damage from fallen trees so we took advantage of being home. Got a short run in yesterday and today we are enjoying a day at home in the rain. We were going to paddle this morning on the Tualatin but the rain kept us in our beds! Can't wait to see everyone Monday night. J

Special training

I am happy to do demo and OGA again. I liked the Monday when we had a special training with the Marine guy. It was interesting to learn variations of what we know. He was funny and liked when he called me “the big guy”. I wish he can come to one of our classes again.

Newport

This week, I went camping with my family in Newport. But I wasn’t able to make it to demo practice. I felt sad because there hasn’t been a demo practice since summer started. Luckily, I was able to do my major act of environment at the beach in Newport.

Sensei Dale Gillilan

While in Alaska last week, I was given the amazing opportunity to meet a man who has studied various martial arts for 40 years. Sensei Dale Gillilan has studied and teaches a combination of techniques from shotakan karate, tai chi, aikido, and other martial arts. He has also studied psychology, various philosophical topics, and physics as a way to increase his knowledge of people and the world around him and apply such concepts to his martial arts training and the training of his students.

Over the course of a few hours, Sensei Dale and I discussed many topics, yet I know we barely scratched the surface of his knowledge and experience. One of the areas we discussed was the idea of striking with intention--this is something we have discussed in our own training when we break bricks. A strike can have different effects based on your intention, whether you want to simply strike to cause pain, strike through (like with bricks or to knock a person down), or strike to send a wave of energy within the body creating a slight whiplash effect. Sensei Dale actually demonstrated all three types of strikes on my left shoulder, and also encouraged me to try them myself. The first two were easy, as they are something I have already learned, however the third strike took a lot of focus on visualizing the process of causing energy to bounce around inside a person's body. However, feeling the differences myself when I was struck was the part of the experience that sticks out the most. Of course, he didn't strike me hard...they were more like slaps. :o)

I found so many other concepts interesting, and I only wish I had more time with Sensei Dale to discuss them. The idea of the collective center being stronger than one center is a very useful concept with self-defense, and we have practiced it before in training wrist locks, but hearing a philosophy behind why we do something in such detail makes it sink in so much more.

There were other concepts such as the continuum from repetition to reaction to responding and so on, as well as learning to use ALL of your senses in understanding what is happening around you at any given moment. Sensei Dale actually had me close my eyes at one point and try and sense where his student was slowly simulating an attack and point to where I thought it was. Now, I have to admit this is something I was skeptical of, and it did take me a while, but eventually I was able to sense the student's striking hand a couple inches a way from my body. I could feel the warmth of his body and something that felt like a disturbance in the air. Now, I'm not saying we should spar with our eyes closed, but the experience was an eye-opening look into the philosophy behind "focus your eyes, focus your mind, focus your body."

I talked to Sensei Dale about my struggle with sparring and other intense contact parts of our training, and about how I felt intimidated at the self-defense seminar. He gave me some really good tips about how to create an energy of power and confidence within myself.

Spending time with Sensei Dale was the best part of my vacation, and I feel so blessed that I was given the opportunity.

this week

this week has been good. i really enjoyed the class where we had the marine come in and show us some stuff. ironically, it was really similar to what we do, with just a slight change in some details. and working with boy sam was fun.

tonight's class was good too. definitely need to work on my takedowns.

Meals on Wheels

Last night, my sister and I spent the night at our grandparent's house. This morning, we helped my grandpa deliver his meals on his regular route. We delivered 13 total meals. It was fun! :) I liked being able to see the people being so happy. Everyone one of the recipients smiled when we gave them the food. The kitchen staff were very friendly. It's such a good thing that they're doing. Someday I want to do something with that kind of impact. Anyway, sorry I can't be at training tonight. My mom had mouth surgery today.

CGN Taylor

Courage is not the absence of fear

Training

Training on monday was a lot of fun. The guy who was leading the training was in the army and he was teaching us some move and attacks of self defense which was really cool. So I feel like I learned a lot of really cool things that day. And I hope we keep practicing those so we can all get better at it. And I hope he comes back so we can learn some more.

break

it was really nice having a break last week... had a great time with my bff and her family, along with seeing my brother who i hadn't seen in a year.  it's not like he lives far away (1.5hrs), there are just other reasons we haven't seen each other but we do talk on the phone every once in a while just to say hi.  now if i could just get rid of this thing called a... JOB! (but still get paid =)) i would have all the free time in the world...  lol

Keep focused

So we had numbers yesterday, and I wasn't satisfied with my results because I felt I could have done better if I didn't catch a multitude of colds over the past month. I spend more time coughing during class and during the runs, only to find out that I may be suffering from allergies. I've never been allergic to anything! Anyhow, so I took 2 Benadryl (which I've never taken before in my life) and slept more yesterday than I have in, I don't know how long. That being said, I'm trying to design a workout schedule that will work with my work schedule as well as the AHAMA class schedules so I can improve my numbers. One thing I've learned is that I simply will not do push-ups, sit-up's, etc at home because I find that I have no less than 30,000 other things I should be doing at home and I get overwhelmed if I try to add working out there too. Ok, I get grouchy. Anyhow, only 2 phases to go and we have to stay focused. We can do it.

Working Through Limitations

Everybody knows about the demo on the 23rd at Relay for Life, right? So, yesterday the demo team was having a practice for that event. We are going to do the TRON form that we performed at the Pacific Jewel in May. That was forever ago! After a couple times through, we as a team started to focus more on the details of the performance. That was when the whole limitations thing came in. Part way through the intro, I was doing a running cartwheel across the spring floor and had so much momentum that I fell off the floor and tripped- onto my bad ankle! My mom says that it's just a twist (and she's usually right about my ankle) and that it should heal fast. The problem is, I'm writing this post from a chair where I have to keep my leg propped up and in an ankle brace. Tomorrow night should be interesting....

Anyway, I still have to keep working on my requirements. Obviously I can't run, or even stretch very effectively but, I can do modified push ups and sit ups. This is good because I'm most behind on them. By the time the 23rd comes, I should be able to do the performance, which is great because it was killing me yesterday when I had to sit out and watch the rest of the group practice. Class tomorrow night will be challenging, but I know I can make it work even if that means taking notes on the side (AGAIN).

By the way: My sister has started a star sewing business so, if any of the candidates need to get their stars sewn on talk to Kenzie. See everyone tomorrow!

CGN Taylor

Courage is not the absence of fear

new post (cause i can't think of anything for a title for this post...)

so what to say? it's amazing how fast we're getting to testing day. everyone has improved lots.

class this week was awesome. i'm really glad for the awesome kicking on the bags. and thanks to cgn jessica for constantly encouraging and keeping up the great energy. you made that class tons of fun. :)

and it was lots of fun doing the one steps again. it's been so long since we did those and i really liked doing them again. it was tons of fun.

yay for numbers tomorrow! it kinda seems that we haven't had a lot of special training this last phase. hopefully we'll get to do it more often til the end of the test *hint, hint* it's the best part of training.

From CGN Sarah

Ok, so I haven’t blogged in a while. I don’t know about the rest of the black belt team, but I thought that last night’s class was super fun. I had a good time cheering everyone on and doing all of those crazy kicks (I had a hard time actually kicking the bag on my Jump Back kicks). Family class was really great to! I was surprised at how good everyone’s jump kicks were! I especially liked it when we did creative kicking lines! J Yay family class! In other news, my dad did really well on his makeup test! I was their official cheerleader. I took all the cheers that we do at my school and changed the names from Sky hawks to Leitners so that I was cheering him on. I’m a little scared about Saturday. KJN says it’s going to be a VERY hard work out and I really want my name on the numbers board again. Later that day I have demo team practice. We are going to rework our previous Tron demo for the performance later in July. I’m really excited to wear our super cool uniforms again! Thank you Molly!!! If you haven’t seen the uniforms, they are really very cool. They have lights strung up and down the arms and legs so that the bad guys (varsity demo team) glow orange and the good guys (Junior Varsity demo team) glow blue! Anyway! That’s all for now! J

CGN Sarah

Sick Sick Sick now BETTER!

So after fast defense on the 25th I got REALLY sick. I was down Monday night after my board meeting and did not return to work until Tuesday after the 4th. I have not been that sick in a really long time! I was feeling a bit better Saturday and every year on our anniversary we back pack - John really wanted to go so we selected a short trail. It was rough going in - I was SO winded with the weight on my pack and the uphill climb. But I made it! The site we were at we think will be the location for the BB backpacking trip in 2012. It was AWESOME. Here is a picture of where we stayed.

Tuesday we biked into the studio and repped out the test requirements for John who did his make up test after class. He did GREAT by the way and we both got our stars! Congrats to Chris on the gold star - he earned it and GREAT class tonight. Loved the energy and loved the bag work.

See you Saturday!

Environmental Act of Kindness

On July 5th my family and I did a neighborhood cleanup. I live in Oak Hills and every year they host a giant fireworks show. It was a great show, however it made a huge mess. So the homeowners association asked for volunteers to help cleanup. I probably picked up 500 pieces of firework shells. Although I had a great day when I looked on facebook about 3 out of 10 posts were about people getting hurt on July 4th. I think people should just be smarter and should not do stupid things like hold fireworks in their hands, come on people!

88 Days....

From today, there are 88 days until October 1st. I am hoping to get all my requirements done by then so I can focus on the rest of the curriculum. That is 88 more days of push ups, sit ups, rows, cardio, stretching and open form reps. It's rather overwhelming, but this is time where you find out how dedicated you really are to the test. Before you know it, October will be here and with it comes all the additional pressure of the final test. I know it will be hard but, it will also be a great experience. Besides, if it was easy, everyone would be a black belt.

Rejuvenated

There's definitely something to be said about rest. I've only been on vacation for a couple days now, but it feels great! I've done A LOT of lounging...something I don't find enough time for during a normal week. Don't worry, I am still working out, and I actually thought about using all this extra time to catch up on my sit-ups and push-ups...then I thought otherwise. I do not want to spend my vacation trying to cram 5,000 push-ups into a ten day period...not even sure if that's physically possible for me at this point. So, I settled on trying to pump out 300 a day, and using the rest of my time to actually rest.

So far, this trip has been restful and inspiring. I went on a 3 mile jog yesterday in the drizzling rain--it was amazing. The Dave Matthews Band music on my iPod combined with the beautiful scenery combined with the falling raindrops and the heat my body was generating created a sensory experience I will never forget.

I'm not sure how many of you are interested in concepts of Zen or the ideas of existential psychology and/or self-actualization, but I find that stimulating my senses and paying attention to the way that my body is interacting with the world around me is a great way to remind myself of how connected everything in the world is, and how much potential I have as a person to affect it.

With the rest, the amazing workout, and the meditation on my place in this world, I have started to feel truly rejuvenated.

Phase 3: Let's start this one off with a wonderful 3 day weekend with no work. No push-ups. No sit-ups. No running. No conditioning. No classes. I never realized how much I missed having a day off from everything. I promised myself I would do NOTHING this weekend I didn't feel like doing, so I can shake the tail end of this dumb cold... Two colds in three weeks is too many.

I actually slept in until 8am! I went grocery shopping in the sunshine and took Adam to Target to use his gift card on a new set of Lego's. Holly was off with her boyfriend's family at Hagg Lake, the understanding husband was off fishing with his friends. Then I came home and actually took an afternoon nap. I slept so good that when I woke up, I was sure it was a weekday morning and I was late for work. I realized it was no such thing, and I cleaned my house because I actually wanted to.

I know numbers are next weekend, and I'll start with a short run along along with push-ups & sit-ups on Monday. But this is the break I needed. Peace. Quiet. Sunshine. Friends. Family. No pressure of any sort to do anything... For two more days, I don't care how many numbers of anything are done anywhere or how many feet, yards or miles I can run. This is me. Not caring. For two more days.

drained

honestly, i don't want to do another pushup, sit up, or row. i'm tired. i'm tired of doing them. i'm tired of the writing down all the acts of kindness, environmental acts, making sure that i have everything done when it needs to be done.

i'm not sure if it's because we've been training since april of 2010 or if it's just these last few months. but i'm tired. i don't want to do this anymore. you know that feeling that you get when you run up a steep hill for what seems like forever? well, that's how i feel-physically but i think this is more emotional and mental.

right now, there's 105 days until october 15th. that's 2,521 hours. i can't wait.